Evening Walks

Evening walks usually begin with me spelling out W-A-L-K. I have to say I'm just as bad as the 'girls'. After husband gives the 'ok' , we start the getting ready process. This involves Elka sensing that we're going, and she starts following me around panting. She paces in front of me as I'm sitting, putting on my shoes. She starts whining and more panting and jumping up and down and jumping on husband. Did I mention her tail, that is waving continually and sometimes knocking things onto the floor? Coco starts jumping up, her paws almost reaching our knees. Unfortunately, this doesn't get corrected because we are usually dealing with Elka trying to keep her from landing on Cocoa. I dress squirming Coco in her sweater, and as we're trying to keep her from having any accidents in the house, I don't want to set her on the floor while I'm preoccupied with Elka. So either Husband holds Coco and I leash Elka or visa versa.
And then we pick up Elka's leash.
Oh my gosh!! Wild, wild wild! You would think we'd never tried training her. We've read books and listened to advice and she still jumps up, over and over. Kneeing her in the chest seems to evoke a happy sense that we're joining in on the fun. Pinching the paws hurts, but there is no lasting results, and I don't remember that making her calm. Walking toward her so that she has no room to jump works only if she has no place to back out of. Yelling just seems to escalate the chaos. The only thing that works is turning your back to her with a loud 'humph!', and sometimes you're turning in a circle until she settles down and sits beside the door. Once down, if we tell her to stay she's usually pretty good about not jumping up anymore , until the next time. Only after she is sitting does she get her 'gentle trainer' and leash put on. And then we open the door and we have another training opportunity. We've done this for a year and a half, and don't expect any change... that way when she finally does just walk over to the door and sit, we'll start jumping up and down shouting 'Halleluah' ...
or should that be "BARK! BARK! BARK!"